What? Mess him up? Oh, heavens no!! I prayed, fussed, cried, had panic attacks over my first pregnancy. I wanted him more than anything in the world. How would I mess him up? You should see the pictures of him on my computer...I'm pretty sure I'm running out of memory just on his pictures alone. He WILL be perfect! So perfect that he will be messed up? So perfect that I will not ever leave him alone to discover his world on his own? So perfect that I won't know when to stop worrying about him? Yes, that perfect!
helicopter parent: n. - they hover closely overhead, rarely out of reach, whether their children need them or not.

It can't be me. I am a laid-back parent. I am constantly told that I'm as easy-going as they come. Aren't I? Sure, if we are out having dinner together and having a glass of wine and my kids are nowhere in sight, I'm very laid back. But, when it comes to my first-born, I am wound up tighter than a tick. I won't even give you examples as an attempt to save myself from embarrassment.
Even I can see the disparities. I am able to evaluate that this is not fair to One-of-a-Kind. Maybe that's the problem...I think he is one-of-a-kind, which he is...no doubt. And maybe, that is what my Father feels for me. That I am one-of-a-kind, and He wants the best for me. Would He be my helicopter parent? Does He want to plan out my days so that I don't have a chance to fail?
Rather than being that helicopter parent, He allows me to move down my path making my own choices and falling into pitfalls along the way, all along hoping for the best for me. I am able to glide over peaks and valleys sometimes with ease and other times with sweat and blood, throwing my burdens and worries His way. You see, this is a life that I have been given by Him, for Him, and with Him.
But, I will NEVER stop wanting the best for my boys. You see, isn't it natural to want more for our children than I am? Shouldn't I hope to strengthen my shoulders for my boys to stand upon? One-of-a-Kind is a product of me and my husband, and he has been entrusted to us. He should be given the space to thrive in his own way without having me interfere in every tiny detail, just as God allows me the space to wander and discover with gentle nudges here and there. Oh my! That is so much easier to write than to do I am sure, but I'll give it my best, because that is what He deserves!
1 comment:
Morgan, you are so dead on!!! Why do we do this to our first born?! Poor Reagan, I am sooooo hard on her. I would like to think I am a laid back parent as well but something about that first born just makes me so hard nosed. You would think we would ease up with the birth of more children but it never seems to change. So I too will make an effort to "ease up". Good luck on your efforts too.
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